skywriter27

I got some great stuff for my 40th birthday including this, this and this!

Not only that, but over 100 people wished me a happy birthday on Facebook!

And I was surprised with a wicked awesome party at El Mariachi Mexican Restaurant.

So cool. 2010 is going to be AWESOME! Thanks everyone for making my 40th so special.

Apparently, yesterday was Boxing Day, and I missed it. I'll try to make up for it by punching two people today.

Thanks to the latest terror attempt, travelers might not be able to get up during the last hour of the flight, or use a lap blanket. That's a bad combination. If I can't leave my seat, I'd at least like to have a blanket to piss into.

I realize that was a bit crude, but given that nobody reads blogs on the weekend, and even noerbodies read them on holiday weekends, I think it's safe to be vulgar. (Yes, I coined a word in the previous sentence. Badly.)

Hey, if each line refers to the previous line, this could be a Mememtous blog. Yikes -- I'm channeling either James Joyce or Soupy Sales. I think I'll go channel surf instead.

In deference to the day, I won't post the idea that hit me when I realized that Xmas could be punned with x-mistress. (You're safe for today, Tiger.)

But while I've got your attention, Merry Christmas. May all the presents you give bring even more joy than you expected.

So, the end of the year is looming. I can't believe it's almost 2010. I still haven't warmed up to 2009!

Goal: Don't waste checks by writing the wrong year on them.

In addition to the insanity of the holidays and lots of wasted checks, the new year brings another interesting occurrence: my birthday.



I turn forty on Friday. When I sat down to write this blog entry I tried to brainstorm things to complain about regarding reaching this milestone. The trouble is that I cannot think of a darn thing to complain about. I'm 25 pounds lighter than I was last year, in better shape than I was at 25 and have finally weaned myself off Dunkin' Donuts (I don't even crave it anymore!). I've got 2 healthy kids and although I have a schedule that would make most people dizzy, it's all good stuff. I've had 2 books published (2007 and 2009) and have another one coming down the pipeline (yay for Seth Baumgartner's Love Manifesto in 2010!). I'm jammin' on my fourth novel and already have ideas for number 5 percolating up there in my noggin.

So, if you read this far in the hopes I'd be my normal snarky self about turning forty, sorry!

Have a happy new year and I'll see you on the other side.

If there's one thing I've learned during my writing career, it's that the majority of copy editors don't seem to realize that the typical 5th-grade narrator hasn't spent much time studying Strunk and White.

The Creature With Fangs Elfed yesterday.



My Beloved Husband Elfed yesterday.



Queen Louise Elfed yesterday.



And I did, too.



A most merry time, indeed!

Revision Tip #23

I rarely have the image systems of my books in mind when I start writing. But by the end of the first or second draft, some image (symbol for Eng lit majors) has cropped up and I realize that I can riff on that symbol throughout the book to tell the larger story. In a subtle way, I hope.

In SPEAK, it was the image of the tree. There was only one mention of it in the early drafts. When I realized the power of it, I wrote in all the art class scenes, and made the tree into a year-long project for her.

WINTERGIRLS was interesting. The first paragraph of the first draft of the book was this:

"The crows stalk me, wings folded neatly behind them, hungry yellow weighing my soft spots. They circle around me once, twice, three times, claws scarring the stone floor of the church.

I curl up on the frozen altar. They flutter close, black feathers filling my mouth and eyes and ears."

I really don't know where that came from; I just wrote it down, plus a bunch of other stuff. The reference to the "frozen altar" is what got me thinking about ancient religions and mythology, which in turn led me to ponder if there was a mythological story within Lia's story. Of course there was: the story of Persephone. That became a central image system for the book, with references to pomegranate seeds and the death that is winter, along with mother/goddess figure at her wits end, trying to pull her daughter back from the grasp of hell.

(For the record - that opening paragraph wound up migrating to page 264. It fits much better there.)

Is there a small detail in your draft that could be expanded into a central image system?

December, 2009, after Al Franken denied Joe Lieberman's request for additional time,
John McCain said, "I've been around here twenty-some years, first time I've seen a member denied a minute or two to finish his remarks."

October, 2002, after Mark Dayton requested additional time, John McCain said, "I object."

So McCain is either lying or he has a very bad memory. (He also has a bad attendance record, since an earlier request for additional time was denied in that same 2009 session.) But I think the real point here is that all politicians lie. We overlook or excuse those politicians who are supporting things we want, and we glare at and despise politicians who are lying in service of things we oppose. The media calls them on their lies, we shrug or curse at the TV or newspaper, and things go on as normal.

I remember when Dick Cheney opened the vice-presidential debate by claiming he'd never been in the same room as what's his name. (Dang, my memory is as bad as McCain's. You know, the $400 haircut, cheat-on-his wife guy. Wait -- that doesn't narrow it down enough.) Anyhow, it turns out they'd been at several prayer breakfasts together. This is by far not the worst lie Dick Cheney ever told. And what's his name isn't entitled to the high ground, either. The point of all this? I'm not sure. I think lying is wrong, and only resort to it myself when it will spare someone's feeings, help me escape discomfort, put extra money in my pocket, or bring pain to my enemies. But it seems, in general, that lies are no longer part of our score card (if they ever really were).

All work in the Forest today will grind to a halt as we enjoy the ceremonial viewing of Elf. And we might even make spaghetti with maple syrup.






I got to thinking about my family's tradition of setting out rice pudding for the julenisse. Nisse have been around long before Christmas celebrations. English words that describe them as elves, or gnomes; I've seen "pixie," too. If properly cared for, nisse will watch out for your farm animals, your house, and your barn. If you don't take care of them, they will cause all kinds of mischief on your property.

Nisse are low-maintenance creatures. All they require is a bowl of rice pudding (risengrød) set outside your door or in your barn on Christmas Eve. We've always done this faithfully and I think our nisse appreciate it.

But as the sun was setting yesterday and I was lighting candles in honor of the solstice I realized that the nisse have been around a lot longer than Christmas celebrations. Ack! Have I been disrespecting the nisse all these years? They are ancient creatures... do they wait, forlorn, on the night of the winter solstice, their tummies grumbling, while the Big People go about their ignorant business? And when the pudding FINALLY shows up on Christmas Eve, do they call up the other nisse and complain?

So last night I put out rice pudding for them. And I will again on Christmas Eve. You can't be too careful with nisse.


Revision Tip #22

Are you sure that you've chosen the right point of view for your novel?

Take your favorite chapter and rewrite from a different POV; shift from third to first, or first to third, or if you are bold and way smarter than me, experiment with the second person POV.

Or.... (and.....) fool around with the tense structure. If your story is told in present tense, rewrite that favorite chapter in past tense. If you've written the whole thing in past tense, try out that chapter in present tense.

What's the point of all this mucking around? It helps you see your characters and the Story from a slightly altered perspective.

I don't know if any of you have seen the wonderful cartoons of Simon and his cat (the one with the baseball bat), but if you haven't, here they are. Simon has a website with a new toon (the cat discovers snow!), his public service announcement for overfeeding animals, and his adventures with the cat (watching television, closing the door, the fly in the house, and of course, the original, it's time to get up and feed the cat).

I love these toons, and I think you will too (if you haven't discovered them already)!

(And there's now a new iTunes game with the cat! I have it on my Touch! ::doin my Snoopy dance::)

If only the shortest day was also the coldest day. It's great to think that the days will now grow longer, and we've passed the darkest moment, but that's balanced by the realization that the whole freezing, snowy, slushy winter season lies ahead. So, yeah, there will be more light, but it will be reflecting off of slick roads.

That having been said, I should add that I totally lucked out as far as snowfall. We only got four inches. Places not all that far from here got over a foot.

Good Solstice, everyone!

I feel like calling your main character Rudolph today. (Humor me.)


Revision Tip #20


Don’t make it too easy on Rudolph.

Your story should not be a tale of the desires of Rudolph. It should be the thwarted desires of Rudolph up until the very end, when finally, FINALLY, things go right, tho' not in the way he originally thought they would.

For every desire, there should be an obstacle. Every step on the path leads to another detour.

Review your manuscript and make sure that poor Rudolph runs into obstacles over and over again. You fiend.


Revision Tip #21

1. Record yourself reading your manuscript aloud. The whole thing.

2. Listen to it with your manuscript in front of you (I am most comfortable with the printed-out version at this point.)

3. Pause whenever necessary to make notes on what needs fixing. This is when I find repeated words, awkward phrases and dropped plot points.

4. After a marathon listening session, go back in and finish all the repair work.

Beware of echoes and doppelgängers!

Maybe I am the only writer in the world who suffers from this bad habit. It makes me crazy. I do it in every blasted book, no matter how hard I try to be aware of it early in the process and avoid it.

I always create characters that are identical, both in their core characteristics and the purpose they serve in the book.

(I may have mentioned this earlier this month, but it is such a big pain in my writing butt, I must rant about it again.)

I spent all day yesterday and the wee hours of this morning extracting one of those characters from my book, and turning over many of his scenes to a different fellow who – I can now see with the blazing clarity of humiliating hindsight – should have been driving those scenes in the first place.

It was a bloodbath, I tell you.

How can you perform this radical surgery in your manuscript?

1. List all the characters.

2. Define – using only a few words – that character’s relationship to the main character.

Examples: comic foil, trusted friend, villain, complication, love interest.

3. If (like me) you have two or more characters that serve the same purpose, get out a magnifying glass and sharpen your scythe. Is it possible to have one of the characters take over scenes from the others?

Example: in the early draft of SPEAK, the character who is now called Heather was two separate girls. Each girl was a “sort of” friend of Melinda for a few months. Each friendship died. Their personalities were a bit different, but not in a strong enough way to affect Melinda’s interactions with them. By melding them together, the story was cleaner.

I am crossing my fingers that the work I am doing this weekend will have the same effect.

Sometimes people forget that I wrote PROM because it is not exactly a depressing book. In fact, it's pretty funny, if I do say so myself. (If I had dread, depression and death in all of my books, I would not be a healthy person!)

So it is with great joy that I announce that PROM has been nominated to the 2010 Popular Paperbacks List, in the "Change Your World or Live to Regret It" category!!

School Library Journal has posted their annual collection of Christmas Memories written by children's authors and illustrators. This year's essays were written by me, my buddy Deb Heiligman, Barbara McClintock, Lauren Myracle, and our National Ambassador for Young People’s Literature, Jon Scieszka. Enjoy!

Revision Tip #18

Are you stuck?

Have you tried all my plotting tips and dialog wisdom and adverb scorn and still you are stuck?

Try this.

1. Make yourself some comfort food.

2. Put on music that relaxes you.

3. Snuggle up in a warm, cozy place with a pen and a pad of paper.

4. Write a letter to your main character. Tell her everything that is worrying you about the story in general.

5. Pause to eat a bit. Make some tea or hot chocolate.

6. Pick up pen and paper again. Tell your character why you are specifically worried about her. Ask her what is going on in her life, in her relationships that you don't understand. Ask her advice about how to help her move forward.

7. Write down what she tells you.

8. If you can't hear her voice, then it is time to put that manuscript away for a while and work on a different story. But I am pretty sure you will hear the voice, so be chill and write.

I've noticed people have been using "penultimate" as if it means "super totally really way beyond ultimate." This will not do. We've already lost "beg the question." "Bemused" is on shaky grounds, and a variety of other useful words have been mishandled by the mouth breathers. The next time you hear someone say something along the lines of, "Wow, McNabb just threw the penultimate touchdown pass," lean over and whisper something along the lines of, "There's only going to be one more pass? How do you know? Are you psychic?"

Wonderful news of positive change from GLSEN (the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network)! After one year of their hard-hitting "Think Before You Speak" campaign, teens attitudes about anti-gay language have significantly shifted.

From the GLSEN website: "For instance, findings from a recent survey conducted by the Ad Council in 2008 and 2009 of teens aged 13-16 suggest that a higher percentage of teens in 2009 think that people should not say "that's so gay" for any reason (38% in 2009 vs. 28% in 2008) and a higher percentage also report "never" saying "that's so gay" when something is stupid or uncool (28% in 2009 vs. 18% in 2008).


"In the Ad Council's nearly 70-year history of creating campaigns to raise awareness and change public opinion and attitudes, we don't often see shifts of this magnitude in just over a year," said Peggy Conlon, president and CEO of the Ad Council. "We're looking forward to building on this success with a new series of PSAs and online tools that will help to further raise awareness and engage teens online."


Here is one of the videos that made the huge impact:



I adore Wanda Sykes. Just saying.

GLSEN is now started their second-year of education and awareness about the devastating effects of anti-gay hatred and language. Their website has information for parents and educators, along with all kinds of stuff you can put on your blog or website, plus polls, videos and lots more. Please take the time to check it out nd pass the word. (Thanks to School Library Journal's Extra Helping for the heads-up!)

Revision Tip #17

I keep thinking about the slightly different approaches Barry Lyga and I have to writing dialog.

I forgot to mention one part of that.

Your audience might affect your decision about how you structure dialog.

Many people are not sure who their audience is when working on the early drafts of their novel. Nothing wrong with that. But as you revise, you need to know who your reader is. The way you tell a story to olders teens will be different than the way you tell it to middle grade students. At least, I hope it would be.

My theory is that teen readers (ninth grade and above) have enough reading and life experience under their belts that they do not need as much visual action details accompanying dialog as younger readers do.

(This could also account for part of the difference between the Lyga and the Halse Anderson Schools Of Proper Dialog; Barry only writes for teens.)

The danger, of course, is that your middle grade (or younger) reader will get bored if you layer on the descriptive action with a heavy trowel.

Try this: Pull out only the action words from your dialog scene. Here's an example from a page I am working on now:

Character A speaks.
Character B gives reader visual description of Character A.
B speaks.
A reaches into sack and speaks. Hands apple to B.
B grabs apple, bites and speaks (note: he hasn't eaten for more than a day). Apple juice runs down his chin.
A removes hat, nods and speaks (introducing self)
B swallows, wipes faces on sleeve, speaks
A speaks
B speaks
A speaks
B chews and thinks
A speaks

I know - it's kind of boring to look at it that way, but by putting it under the microscope, I can make sure that the action details are an integral part of the story. They reinforce the fact that Character B is hungry, that he needs help, and that Character A might be a person he can turn to. It also balances a debt, because B helped A out of a bind in an earlier scene.

Bonus tip: since action in dialog scenes needs to be minimal and precise, it is a great opportunity to hone in on that perfect tiny detail that says volumes about the characters, setting, or conflicts at hand.

Every time I see this in one form or another, I am amazed:


As a writer, what do you notice? What do you let slide by?

In case you're curious, here is the explanation:

In a brilliant example of my lack of marketing savy, I decided that the looming release of Dead Guy Spy, the second Nathan Abercrombie, Accidental Zombie book, would be the perfect time to unveil the cover for book 3, Goop Soup. Being stunningly lazy incredibly resourceful, and lacking a jpeg of the cover, I decided to search the internet rather than wrestle with my ancient and badly documented scanner. To my amusement, I discovered that a Google image search for "goop soup" (including the quotation marks) brought up a picture of Gwyneth Paltrow. While she has a site called "Goop," the only thing we really have in common is we both love our Apple. (Though hers is a child and mine is a II.) But I digress. I managed to wrestle the scanner into submission. Here's the cover. I like it a lot.

Yesterday was.... let's not go into it.

Today is here and that is all that matters.

If you are still shopping for a winter holiday, read "Cheese and Crackers Never Changed Anyone's Life" and then finish your shopping at Indiebound.

There now - wasn't that simple?

Congratulations to Melissa on this WINTERGIRLS video - the project earned her a 100 in her class.

Revision Tip #16 (yes, I know it should be 15, but yesterday really was something of a mess and it's easier this way. Do you remember the "Bruce" sketch of Monty Python? Remember how there was no Rule #6? This is the same thing.)

Where was I?

Right, Revision Tip #16

Revision is the perfect time to brainstorm.

Really.

Brainstorming is not a one-and-done part of the writing process. Not the way I see it. After that messy first draft, I usually have chapters that feel empty or out-of-place. I mentioned the way I use huge sheets of paper to organize my chapters. Here is another technique.

1. Identify the critical chapters in your novel. Which are the ones that contain The Really Big Stuff?

The Really Big Stuff chapters will usually be separated by chapters in which the action unfolds in a slightly less intense way. Think of your novel as a wide river that your reader needs to cross. The RBS (Really Big Stuff) chapters are small islands in the river. The other chapters are either stepping stones or bridges that get the reader from one island to the next.

2. List the Stones & Bridges chapters, then prioritize them by how alive they feel. What is the chapter that feels the most flat - the chapter (or chapters!) you are secretly wondering if you should cut?

3. Don't cut them yet.

4. There is no Four.

5. Brainstorm as if you were starting from scratch. For each of the flat chapters, dream up ten different ways the action could unfold. Go ahead - be outrageous. I dare you. Sometimes thinking way outside the box is what you need to jolt your writer brain into clearer storytelling.

6. (Please note; there IS a Rule Six, Bruce!) Pick one of the ten and just freewrite the chapter over again. How does it help the reader understand the characters better? How does it move the story forward?

7. Rinse. Repeat. Send me questions.

I had a blast at Foxwoods Resort Casino this weekend. For those of you who are unaware, I had four book signings there on Saturday and Sunday. The great part was that my signings were right on the gaming floor among the poker players and the racing fans!

WARNING: To add to my string of photographic maladies, I misplaced my camera and could not find it before I had to leave. Hence, all of the photos were taken on my phone. Ugh.

Here is the monolith called Foxwoods as I drove up in the rain.



And a monolith it is. Foxwoods is really four hotels and four casinos all connected together by what I call mallways (that's malls + hallways). Simply massive, I tell you. It was a good fifteen minute walk from my room to the places where I did my book signings! But let me tell you that it is an AMAZING feeling to be walking through the casino and hear a booming voice announce to all 50,000 patrons and 10,000 employees that "author Eric Luper is here at Foxwoods to sign his two novels, Big Slick and Bug Boy."

When I heard the announcement that first time, I almost fainted. Seriously.

The first place I signed was the race book. It's where all the horseracing fans congregate to bet on the ponies. Here is the poster I spotted around the casino.

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And here I am at my table in the race book holding BUG BOY and BIG SLICK. All those electronic signs behind me have horsey stats on them.



Then it was onward to another super-cool locale:



If you are a poker fan, you will recognize that logo as that of the World Poker Tour. That's right, I signed books right in the WPT poker room! It is the largest poker attached to a casino in the world and certainly the most famous overall. Just mega cool. Here is the sign that appeared around the casino for that signing:



And when I say I was right among the poker players, I am not exaggerating. I was mere feet away from a $1-$3 no-limit Hold'em table. And when I got to the poker room for my Sunday signing, they ran a poker tournament around, you guessed it, BIG SLICK! For periods of time throughout the tournament, any player showing an ace and a king won an autographed copy of my novel, BIG SLICK!

Oh and here is the view from my hotel room:



And here is where I spent much of my time when I was not signing books:



A pool very similar to the one Andrew and Jasmine sneak into in Big Slick!

Needless to say, they do things right over there at Foxwoods. Thank you to Nanz, Dawn, Linda and all the other great people who helped arrange such a memorable event!

I fear it is time for me to reread Palumbo.

If that sentence causes your gut to clench in sympathy, you are probably a professional writer. Or a professional therapist.

If that sentence means nothing to you, be happy.